Dearest Pfizer,
Ok everyone has seen it and we're tired of it. You know what I'm talking about. It's your horrid commercial (which seems to run as every other commercial), alternating with Mycoxafloppin, your erectile dysfunction pill, and Uhavaitchipus, your anti-yeast infection medicine promoting your new wunderkind drug Lyrica which is used to treat extreme nerve pain. It may work wonders for your sales and kickbacks to your doctors but enough is enough! Stop it with the commercial already. If you haven't seen the commercial you are running, I shall now include it here for your viewing pleasure courtesy of Youtube.com:
Now I've got a few questions at this juncture:
a. If her pain is so bad and "her muscles, so tender to the touch, " how the hell did she manage to gasp the pen to write in her fancy-schmancy journal?
b. Who the hell writes like that and even more, who would read that to an audience?
Give me a break. People in pain do not write about it that way. Have some balls and do it right, Pfizer. I suggest any of the following in your next commercial:
"HOLY PAIN PILL, BATMAN, MY LEGS HURT."
"YEAH IT HURTS, BUT IT'S A DRY HURT."
"LYRICA - APPLY DIRECTLY TO YOUR PAIN AREA."
That last one might be a little too close to another really bad commercial to use. I'm sure that you all have your own creative team and can pay them well with all the money you make. The point is, if you are going to jam this down our throats, make the commercials at least entertaining.
Looking at your website, I see that it is quaintly organized by symptom/condition or medication name. This is a very useful feature and it is well thought out (take it from a fellow web designer - wink wink). Just browsing, I have quickly selected a few conditions to which we can apply the Lyrica scripting test.
Condition: High Anxiety
"My anxiety, so acute and - WHAT WAS THAT?"
Condition: Insomnia
"My insomnia, so awake and restless."
Condition: Erectile Dysfunction
"My member, so pale and wimpy."
I think you can get the point....
Pfizer, your commercials have even affected my oldest child who just turned four years old. My daughter, so sweet and friendly to others, has evidently been deeply changed by your commercials. This afternoon, while exiting the shower, I heard my wife giggling in the family room. "You need to go show your daddy." She said.
I entered the family room and my oldest daughter was smiling at me holding a legal pad gently in her arms as if she were a high paid executive assistant taking dictations from her boss.
"What is that?" I asked her.
"That's my letter, daddy." she replied.
"What are you writing about?" I asked again.
"I'm writing about My Father's Algia." She said.
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